Monthly Archives: February 2016

#TheFutureOf:Television

IN THE FUTURE the ‘television’ will be an amalgamation of a desktop computer merged with an adjustable recliner.

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(above: artist rendering of the telecliner.)

The aim of this invention is to enable North Americans to be able to do all of their favorite (and non-favorite) activities from one singular location.  The final component to make this day come to pass is the invention of the “hard light keyboard”.

virtual-keyboard
(above: the Hard Light Keyboard “HLK” invented by L’Aight! K. Hardley in 2026.)

As to be expected, the invention  will cause a few drawbacks in modern society, such as; an increased rate of cancer due the constant proximity to electronic devices, diabetes and muscle atrophy.

On the plus side, cybersex will make a huge comeback, which will eradicate all sexually transmitted diseases by the late 21st century (a.k.a. the Anno Domini era), while having the adverse effect of a 56% rise in elbow and wrist tendinitis.

#TheFutureOf:JobsInAmerica

IN THE FUTURE there will be two types of jobs in America.  Podcasters and people who critique podcasters (on their own podcast of course).

On that day, the Earth will implode and reality will come undone by the sheer magnitude of the ouroboros it creates.

I am fairly confident that I made the correct choice investing all of my capital in oil, corn and steel pots, because that’s a show I wouldn’t want to miss without a huge tub of popcorn.

#TheFutureOf:Communication

IN THE FUTURE the English (spoken) language will be whittled down to two words/expressions: “Like” and “Y’know”.  On rare occasions, both at the same time.  All other communication will be restricted to handheld devices which will consist of a variation of beeps, boops, squees and clicks.

(below: approximate appearance of the evolved bipeds once known as “Humans”)tumblr_inline_nargysAIaE1qdziiy